Prison vs. College

Valentine's Day Fondue

Lily and Skyler get confused about one thing over and over and over.  And I just want to record it for future laughs.  I don't remember how we once got onto the topic of jail a long time ago, but it stuck in their heads.  And so did college.  And sometimes they confuse them, as evidenced by this morning's conversation (as well as many other times).

Lily: "Skyler, you need to be good.  Remember, when we're good we get to live with Jesus again.  And do you remember what happens when we're really really bad?"

Skyler:  "Oh yeah!  Like, you might go to college!"

Every time Ben and I have to clarify that college is awesome, jail is not.  But before they really get it, it's priceless to watch their faces when we remind them that Ben and I both went to college.

Edited Fast-Forward

The last few months I feel like I've finally hit that phase in life that I've been dreading: the "I'm-way-too-busy-to-have-time-to-do-anything-just-ask-the-pile-of-clothes-on-my-laundry-room-floor-while-I-type-away-writing-this-post-trying-not-to-think-about-it phase."

I feel like I've been going non-stop since we decided back in May to put our house on the market.  I haven't had any time to write for fun since then, so instead, I've just done a lot of thinking about writing (while I'm busy doing something else, of course).

One of my biggest thoughts is this: why do we get so wrapped up in stories?  Why do we love reading a great book?  Why do we get sucked into incredible movies or TV shows?  Why are they somehow worth our time away from reality for a few hours at a whack?  And why do some people get seriously obsessed?

I think I found the answer.  Or at least what is the answer for me.  It's because all of these things are in what I would call "edited fast-forward."  Books, movies, etc. are all edited by professionals.  There is absolutely nothing in a book that isn't meant to be there.  It's a waste of time to read about something that isn't building the story and so it's left out.  Writers go through dozens of rough drafts so that they can edit their books until they're decidedly perfect.  I'm assuming it's the same with anything behind the camera.  

But editing -- or, really, just taking things out -- doesn't happen in real life.  Neither does the fast-forward.  A book takes on average 10 hours to read.  A movie is about 2.  A lifetime is a lot longer.  You definitely can't tell your lifetime's story in fast forward without editing it.

In books you're not going to read about catching yourself staring into space, or waiting for someone who's running late, or taking a half an hour to chop up everything that needs to go onto your homemade vegetarian pizza.  They're all time-wasters on paper.  But we get them in life everyday.  So essentially, books and movies are all created to show the best and the worst moments and pretty much nothing of the doldrums.  

So I've tried to see the beauty in what would be a waste of space in a book.  Today I got to watch my kids ride their bikes in circles over and over and over and over and their joy was priceless.  When Thad is only happy when he's in my arms, I just look at him.  He's our skinniest baby but he's still squishy.  He laughs when I do absolutely nothing.  It's the best.

When I look back on times that back then I would have wanted to fast forward through, I'm grateful now that I didn't have that option.  Being edited and pressing fast-forward isn't in the plan, nor should it be.  And in that, life is so much more beautiful than in a book or movie, because those just are not realistic, even when they're based on a true story.

Just don't ask me about my feelings about the option of fast forwarding when I'm working out. 

A Toothy Miracle

**WARNING: Do not read this to your young children**

It's sort of a long story.  But I love it.

Lily loves the Tooth Fairy.  We had tried for a couple of years and many different ways to get Lily to stop sucking her thumb and finally the Tooth Fairy card was what worked.  We told Lily that the Tooth Fairy doesn't bring money to kids who still suck their thumbs.  I felt horrible telling her that, but it was what worked.

So when Lily pulled out her first tooth while my parents were over yesterday she was so excited.  She knew it was coming out soon and had already written a note to the Tooth Fairy that she would like to keep her tooth.

Ben went to bed early last night and my mind was on a million different things.  So instead of remembering Lily, I went straight upstairs to read my scriptures, say my prayers, and go to sleep.

Then I had a dream that it was Christmas morning and I didn't remember it at all.  I saw Lily come down the stairs completely devastated that her cookies and milk were still untouched and that there were no presents to be found.  I felt so guilty that I didn't remember something so important.  That's when I heard Lily sadly say, "Good morning, Mom."  I woke up from that dream and realized that I had forgotten about Lily's tooth.  It was already morning and Lily was completely devastated.  I can't tell you how sick I felt.

Then I woke up again in panic.  It was a dream within a dream and it was only 1:45 in the morning.  It sounds cheesy but I felt like Scrooge on Christmas morning.  There was still time!  So I ran downstairs, grabbed a dollar, and slid it under her pillow before I pulled her blanket back onto her.

This is no loaves and fishes story.  It's no parting of the Red Sea.  But this was my own little personal miracle.  I could feel Heavenly Father's hand in it so much, because He knew how long Lily had waited for this night, it was enough to get her to stop sucking her thumb many months ago.

I feel so bonded with Ben not just because he's my husband but because he's the only other person who loves my children as much as me.  But last night reminded me first hand how Heavenly Father loves my children immensely more than me and wants them to be happy.  I'm thankful that He helps me along when I fail as a parent.

Lily woke up thrilled to find that the Tooth Fairy had come.  And I woke up thrilled for small miracles.

The Storm

 Last week I found out that we were going to get "some snow" this week.  "Some snow" is usually predicted as being a few inches and then turns out to only be enough to say "It's snowing!" on facebook just as the last flake falls.

That's not what happened.  At all.

It snowed for 3 hours on Tuesday.  We went and picked up Lily early from school.

Then yesterday around lunchtime it was supposed to start snowing again.  The kids were already bored and so for some reason I let them do this:

Did I make your eyes explode?  No?  Well good morning, because I know you're awake now.

Lily obviously has kept some skills secret these 5 years.

We ended up getting about 5 inches of snow before the freezing rain started and went through the night.  And any time you know freezing rain is coming, you know the likelihood of your power going out is high.

At 3 AM today Ben woke me up to tell me the power was out.  It's a good thing we brought everything in from the garage and attic so we could conserve our heat.  We turned on the fireplace and our kerosene heater.  We hung up these blankets so that we only had to warm our living room/kitchen area.  By 8 AM our power was restored (and only went out for an hour after that).  We were the luckiest in our neighborhood.  Most everyone had their power out for a better part of the day.

 When I was checking on things outside I discovered that a little bunny had taken shelter under Ben's car.  So of course I had to bring it some food.

 We were really fortunate that we didn't have any pines snap.  We lost quite a few branches but none of them hit the house.  

I also heard that we're going to get another wave of snow tomorrow night.  Yay....

Every new season Ben always complains that I always say, "It's not a normal winter/spring/summer/fall."  After today I said, "Okay, this is a normal winter now."  We may not get an ice storm like this every single year, but it's definitely normal.  The stores running out of groceries, people taking multiple hours to drive a mile, school being out for several days in a row, I make dozens of cookies in preparation for a power outage... all normal.

And just as importantly, when the sun came up and we were able to see our ice covered world for the first time.  Lily looked at me and asked, "Mom, is Elsa from Frozen in our world?"

An Unexpected Change

I secretly majored in education for a second reason (other than to become a teacher.)  It was in case of the off chance that I wasn't comfortable with how the education system would be when my kids would be in school.  I thought there was a small possibility that I would choose to homeschool my kids, and if any college major would help me, it would be education.  But when I was thinking this out before I even started college, I just assumed that if I ever did homeschool my kids, it wouldn't be until they were in middle or high school.

I was wrong.

Many of you know that we moved into our house to let our kids go to some of the best schools in the county.  I wrote a post all about it HERE.  And while we couldn't love Lily's school any more than we do now, Ben and I have had some pretty strong impressions that we'll be homeschooling much sooner than we thought.  These promptings have come on their own, but we have had several experiences lately that have solidified our decision.

Ben and I have gained understanding in one particular (and some may call unfortunate) way.  Lily suffers from anxiety.  Before school started she was the toughest kid in the world -- she hardly ever cried.  As I came to have much more contact with her teacher, I learned that Lily was crying almost all day and would have nervous breakdowns.  Then they started at home.  She'd get extremely frustrated if she couldn't figure out something in her homework and she could only practice reading for about 10 minutes at a time before she would be in tears.  She's much better now, but still suffers from anxiety.  Luckily, there is such an awesome team at Lily's school that has taken her under its wing.  Ben and I were even able to have a meeting with quite a few of them, and we could not be more thankful for the help they are giving Lily.  But as we were in this meeting, all of them made it clear how downhill the education system is going with Common Core and how they're being put out of the comfort zones as teachers.  Students aren't able to keep up.  Teachers are resigning.  Children are staying at home on purpose because of the constant standardized testing.  Lily's teacher even told me that she cheats when she tests the kids, for their own benefit.  Everyone in the meeting was in agreement, even the Vice Principal.  Because of Lily's anxiety problem, we've been able to get a behind-the-scenes and in depth look at where education is going.

I know without a doubt that one of the reasons why miracle after miracle took place to get us into our exact house was so that Lily could get this help.  She is currently undergoing extensive psychological testing to see what struggles she may have (ADD, etc.).  We look forward to getting those results so that we can better address her needs and lessen her emotional struggles.

If I had my way, I would have Lily tough it out and stay in public school so that she could grow in an environment where she would fit in like any other kid.  That's just what makes sense to me.  But thank goodness for the spirit and for the guidance we receive when we're wrong.  Because as time has gone on, I've come to realize I don't need to raise my kids just like everyone else.  I need to raise my kids the best way I can, in whichever way that is.

Ben and I are planning on sending Lily and Skyler off to school this upcoming year, and then we'll probably pull them out for good and educate them at home, as well as Ella and Thad when they're old enough for kindergarten.

I am giving myself the next year to educate myself about homeschooling so that I can be as best prepared as I can be to give my kids the best possible education.  I'm going to pull out my old college notes and refresh my mind on everything I was taught about education.  Ben and I know this is going to be quite the change for our family, but it couldn't feel more right.  I am thankful that Lily could have public schooling now so that she can get the testing done that she needs, and I'm thankful that we'll be able to take control over their education in probably 2015 so that we can steer them where we choose.  It's actually sort of liberating.

While I agree that homeschooling is right for us, I also wholeheartedly believe that homeschooling isn't for everyone and that parents know best what is right for their family.  But as usual, life has turned in a way that we weren't expecting.  But my guess is that that also means it will turn out better than we were expecting -- as it always does when you follow the spirit.

The Art Museum (and a giggling Thad)

Stomach flu = not fun.

But the kids managed to have fun even when they were sick.

Proof:

But since school was out while we were sick for 4 days straight because of the 2 inches of snow, we needed to get out of the house.  So we went to the art museum.

 In the elevator.  *cue elevator music*

 The new building I had never been in.

 They had a Porsche exhibit at the museum.   But since the tickets were $18/person, we just enjoyed the cars that were on display to the public for free.

Ben and I have always found it interesting that kids can recognize Jesus in any picture.  Even Ella can do it.  They just know.

I love me some Monet. 

.... and some Georgia O'Keeffe. 

Ben and I thought it was cool that they had this engraving of Robert Louis Stevenson writing in Samoa.  Yay Samoa!  Yay NC Museum of Art! 

A famous picture of a famous dude.

 Me and The Pumpkin.

Ben's version of waffles.  Hello. 

Poor little Thad couldn't make it through dinner.  It's exhausting being cute all day.

And last but not least, a movie of him giggling.  Does he not just make you melt?