I have to admit that it's somewhat miraculous to me that Ben and I have survived the past 2 months. It's been no easy task to have babies so close in age and so young. I hear it'll be awesome once they're a little older, but for now I'm in the "one-day-I'll-laugh-at this stage" where I try to laugh instead of cry. But lately Ben and I have really felt like we've been coming to the end of our rope. All sorts of things have been skewed in our life (but who has a normal life???) and we just felt like things in general aren't moving anywhere.
One of the biggest issues on our minds is that Ben graduated in April but still hasn't been able to find a career. It was economically a really bad time to graduate from college with a business degree. Together we've put out over 1,000 applications and resumes that have seemed to lead to nothing. But life goes on and we continue to job hunt and be grateful for Ben's current job. However on Friday Ben came home with good news. No he didn't find a job, but he was promoted! This came with a pay raise for which we are grateful! This has really taught me that what I think is best for us (in this case, finding a job) isn't always what the Lord has in mind for us. I'm just grateful that He gave us another blessing that will be beneficial for our family.
I'm also extremely grateful for this past General Conference. I think that I, personally, really needed some of those talks. I'm so grateful for General Authorities who can instruct me on ways to better myself. The gospel really is such a blessing for our family, and really all I have to say is thank goodness we're an eternal family! I wouldn't have it any other way!
My last bit of gratitude I owe to my parents and also Ben's. As all other parents understand, sleep deprivation is a killer! And Sky is a baby who loves being awake at night. Our parents encouraged us to go ahead and teach him how to sleep through the night by letting him cry. I wasn't looking forward to this. To be completely honest I was totally spoiled with Lily (who slept through the night for the first time at 2 weeks) and so I haven't felt ready to be the bad guy with Sky. Well I figured since Sky hasn't changed his sleeping patterns at all since he got home from the hospital (except for the fact that he doesn't eat much when he wakes up) I might as well do the dirty work now instead of in a few months. So three nights ago Ben gave Sky a blessing and we decided we'd let him make noises for a while before getting him and then get him 15 minutes after he started crying. So I didn't have to get up with him until 3:30 which is already amazing for Sky! Then the next night we decided to let him cry himself back to sleep each time he woke up in the night. He cried for 4 hours. I had prepared myself emotionally for this after all of the horror stories I've heard. I knew it would be no easy task so I popped in my ear plugs and closed the door. I actually slept off and on. Ben wasn't so lucky. Sky's cries kept him up. But last night we decided to do the same thing again. He woke up at 2:30 for a few minutes and then not again until 6:30! I actually spent a whole night in bed! Woohoo!!!!! And although we'll continue to teach Sky to sleep (and I definitely expect him to be imperfect) it's nice to know that there is hope for the future and that bliss isn't as far away as I thought.
I think that through our struggles the Lord has really been making me work on my faith. And as I've been trying to get through what I think of as burdens I'm just coming to realize that they're not so much burdens as they are exercises to make us stronger. I have really seen that the Lord really doesn't make us run faster than we have strength, but we can't grow stronger unless we're using our muscles during some really tough exercises! And now that I really see that things are moving forward all I have to say is that I'm thankful. :)
P.S. I'll post some pics of Sky soon!
