Quick To Judge

Today I was checking out at the grocery store with my two pizzas when the cashier asked me, "Are you the lady with the dog in the car?"  Immediately I had butterflies in my stomach.

"Yes."

My parents are out of town and we're watching Mia.  We had a 3 hour house inspection and dogs aren't allowed to be there.  We had just left our house after I tried to make it look as clean as possible.  I had rolled down the windows and it wasn't too hot yet so I wasn't worried.  But Mia is deathly afraid of being in the car so naturally she yapped.  We had literally walked in to get pizzas and checked out right away.  5 minutes - max.

The cashier continued.  "I'm really sorry but there's a crazy lady out there who saw that you just left a dog in your car and she said she was going to call the cops on you."

I turned around to look out the window and sure enough there was a woman standing outside my van with a cell phone in hand.  I took a deep breath as I walked out, but nothing could have prepared me for how she was going to chew me out.

When I explained that I was only inside for 5 minutes and that my dog was perfectly fine she told me she knew because she was watching me.  Then she kept ranting on about how I would never keep one of my own kids in the car for 5 minutes.  Blah blah blah.  She kept going while I tried to get all 3 kids into their seats and buckled.

When I had heard enough I finally said, "I understand your concern ma'am, thank you," and walked away.

In my head I kept thinking, I should have known that something like this would have happened.  Not that someone was going to call the cops on me the first time I had ever left a dog in my car, but because of all weeks, this was the whopper of the one to choose.

She didn't know that my sweet sweet uncle just died from cancer who was way too young to die.  She didn't know that I have cried basically every day since his death because I'm struggling with the reality of it.  She didn't know that his funeral just so happened to be today and that the only reason why I couldn't fly out to Utah was because my husband is on a business trip in Atlanta.

She didn't know that I was juggling selling and buying two houses.  She didn't know the stress I'm under to get everything done while managing three small kids.  She didn't know that my husband was out of town and that I don't sleep soundly when he's not around so I'm also exhausted.

She didn't know that I have a million concerns on my mind right now and that staying afloat has been about all I can do.

She didn't know that the pizzas were a thank you to my good friend/Relief Society president who so kindly allowed us (plus Mia) to crash at her house during the inspection.  She didn't know that I was actually at the store trying to do something nice for someone else.

Instead, she only saw me as the lady who apparently abuses animals.  It was a lot to take in.

But then, I did the same to her.  The first thing I did when I realized she was a mom was notice that she was wearing a very sheer white shirt with a black bra.  Immediately, I sarcastically handed her the mother of the year award in my head.

But I don't know her.  And she doesn't know me.  Maybe her uncle just died and she's upset because she can't go to his funeral either.  Maybe she's in the process of moving, too.  Maybe she's just trying to save all the animals who were ever left in the car for 5 minutes.  I don't know.  But something I do know is that I rarely know anyone's full story other than my own. 

As much as it hurt to have the cops called on me for the first time in my life (although I still haven't heard from them... hmmm...) I learned my lesson that you just can't judge people.  Ever. 

New House Tour

This is going to be our next home.  I'm so grateful it's our second house and not our first because we have definitely learned some things about what is important to us in a house and what isn't.  For example, schools were at the top of our list this time around, as well as the feel of the neighborhood, having more privacy via trees in the back yard, and some other little things.  This house had it all, then came with more to offer -- all wrapped in a pretty box.

 

 

 

Front door and dining room to the right.

 

Dining Room.

 

Living Room.  And Ella.  Door goes to screened-in-deck.

 

Kitchen.

 

Desk and entry to Dining Room.  The white door is the pantry.  The hallway goes back into the mud room, powder room, and garage.

 

Close-up of kitchen.  I sort of love it.  And maybe this is such a nerdy thing to say, but I'm going to be getting a dishwasher with buttons on the inside.  No more kids changing the dishwasher settings!  Happy birthday to me!

*proceed to make fun of me now*

 

Our deck that will soon be screened in.  You can barely see Lily on the ground in pink.

 

Part of our back yard, which will soon be fenced by the builder.  Woohoo!  Lily and Skyler always go back to that clump of trees to pick the wild daisies.  Ben and I are just thrilled about actually having hardwoods that will give us privacy (for most of the year anyway).

 

My laundry room that is currently the neighborhood's agent's office.

 

Lily and Ella's room.

 

Lily and Ella's bathroom.

 

Skyler and #4's room.  They also have an identical bathroom to the girls' attached to their room.  At first we thought it was ridiculous that every bedroom had its own bathroom, but then when we thought a few years down the road, we realized that  it'll be nice to let the boys have their own bathroom and the girls their own.  I can see this solving a whole lot of conflict when we have 4 teenagers in the house.

 

On a side note... 4 teenagers in the house?!?!?!  AAAAA!!!!

 

Master Bedroom.

 

Master bath.

 

Master closet.

 

Bonus.
(I spy a hubby who is trying to hide)

 

 

There you have it!  And there's less than a month until we move in.  We are pretty thrilled about this whole move.  The only room that isn't shown on this tour is the walk up attic that will be finished some year down the road, but for now, we'll enjoy the house as it is.

5 Fingers Old

Today Lily turns 5.  Or at least that's what she thinks.  Technically she won't be 5 until Monday but since Ben's leaving on his first ever business trip next week we bumped it up to today -- our 6th anniversary.  You're welcome, Lily.

 

This is actually Lily's first ever birthday party.  Yeah.  I know.  Two thumbs down for me.  But every year it just didn't seem to work.  But even with this whole selling our house craziness, I knew I'd have to throw her a party this year.  And since our house sold so quickly we didn't even have to worry about making a mess!  Sweet!

 

Lily was completely spoiled with presents.

 

 

I will entitle the next series of pictures, "The Evolution of Ella Eating Her First Cupcake."

"Hmmm...."

"Okay, so maybe this is kind of awesome."

"YES.  Definitely awesome.  MUST. STUFF. FACE."

"Nom, nom, nom."

"Where'd it go?"

Then Nanni and Papa came over and Lily got her first ever music box.

 

Lily was thrilled with it all.  If I knew that all it took was cupcakes, balloons, and friends to create a perfect child, I would make that a constant at my house. 

 

Here are some things I love about Lily at this age:

• She is an ideal older sister.  She considers Skyler her best friend (although with that comes daily BFF fights) and Ella the best present we ever gave her -- because she still considers Ella someone that belongs to her, not us.  Half of the time Lily gets to Ella's aid before I do if she's in trouble.  When Ella's happy, Lily can make her belly laugh harder than anyone.  Those two have not lost their bond.  It is phenomenal to me. 
• She is smart.  She reads, writes, and does simple math. 
• She is spiritual.  Not too long ago (but before we had sold our house) Lily came down from her nap to talk to Ben and me.  As if it was an obvious fact, she told us that we would very soon be moving to "the house with the pool."  That is what we call the house we are currently under contract with.  At that point we had been burying ourselves in the MLS to find every possible home available in the area.  We had been interested in several houses but "the house with the pool" was always at the top of our list.  It turned out that she was right, that of all the houses, that was the one.  *And for clarification, no the house does not have a pool in the back yard.  But the neighborhood has a pretty killer pool with a huge yellow water slide that always grabs our kids attention, hence why it's called "the house with the pool."
• She has probably asked us daily for the last two years when she can start going to school.  I'm absolutely thrilled for her that her first day of kindergarten is coming up in a couple of months, but I am completely mopey myself about the idea of a teacher spending as much time with her each day as me. 

I love this stage of multi-colored pedicures and make believe play and waxy makeup kits, but I guess the idea of my kids growing is a pretty beautiful thing.  If I could have pressed the pause button on Lily when she was a baby, I would have.  But I wouldn't have known how much Lily adores babies, how she is a Fancy Nancy twin, or how she is so determined to choose the right.  Growing up is awesome, even if I do cry for every birthday.

 

Oh how we love this girl.  Every night before Ben and I go to bed we go into our kids' rooms to tuck them in and give them a final goodnight kiss.  Lily actually woke up one night a couple of weeks ago and she asked us what we were doing.  When we explained that we do this every night she asked why.  "Because we love you."  And that we do. 

 

Happy birthday, Lils.  You're a whole hand of fingers old which means you get to go to school.  Your life's biggest dream come true.

SOLD!

 

FRIDAY 6/7

 

House goes on the market

 

 

SATURDAY 6/8

 

Showing for Couple #1.  They love the house.

 

 

SUNDAY 6/9

 

Nothing.

 

 

MONDAY 6/10

 

Couple #1 tells our agent, Sheri, that they want to see the house again to put in an offer.  Sheri keeps this information to herself because of the late hour and she wants us to get sleep.  Bless that woman because we totally wouldn't have slept.

 

 

TUESDAY 6/11

 

Sheri tells us that Couple #1 wants to put in an offer after they see the house again.  We get way too excited.  We leave the kids with my mom to go house hunting.  Couple #1 puts in a pretty low offer.  Then we find out a second couple wants to see the house.  Agent #2 books an appointment for a preview of the house for the agent alone.

 

 

WEDNESDAY 6/12

 

We counter with Couple #1.  Agent #2 loves the house when she tours it and says she'll be bringing her clients on Friday.

 

 

THURSDAY 6/13

 

Couple #1 counters with a fantastic offer.  We hesitate to accept it because we know from some digging that our agent has done that Couple #2 is very serious too.  We decide to wait on any decisions until after Couple #2 has seen the house.

 

 

FRIDAY 6/14

 

Couple #2 couldn't come to see the house due to a storm and lack of power, but trust their agent enough to put in an offer (what???).  Between asking price, closing costs, appliances -- basically everything in the two contracts -- the difference in offers was about $150.  Ben and I pray and get an extremely clear answer.  We are giving the house to Couple #1.

 

 

 

 

I didn't think this would happen this way.  My mom did.  She kept telling me that our house was going to sell fast -- that she could just feel it.  But I didn't feel it.  In fact I was so sure that our house was undesirable to everyone but us.  But clearly I was wrong.

 

The lesson I have learned from this experience is that when you're too shocked by Heavenly Father's news that it's time to move -- um, right now -- you move -- right now.  I can see why we needed to hurry so that we could give our house to this particular young family and move on to our next.

 

And speaking of the next.... we know which one we want.  We have since the beginning of May.  But I will speak more of it when things become official.  But oh how we are crossing our fingers for this glorious home.  Whether we get it or not, we are definitely going to Holly Springs.

 

We close on our house July 17th.  So only about a month to go.  And I have epic plans of a family sleepover in the castle our last night.  EPIC. 



Third Year's a Charm

Our section of NC is infamous for its soil, or should I say clay?  One of the first things we did when we moved into this house was to plant a garden.  That year we decided to test our dirt on its own to see what we could produce.  Pretty much everything died except for the few tennis ball sized cantaloupes that became our pride and joy.

 

So basically it was a big fat failure.  We didn't just blame it on the clay.  We also blamed it on the fact that our builder completely stripped our neighborhood of all the topsoil before putting grass down (and you can see what awesome quality grass it is now... walking on it is like walking on needles).  When we dug down a little bit we found that the builder had also buried a lot of leftover building materials like broken wood and bent nails.  Lovely.

 

So we knew our only option for a good garden was a raised bed.  Last year Ben built one that expanded all the way across our back yard.  We filled it with 5 cubic yards of okayish soil (hey, we were on a budget) and planted away.  We got a ton of plants (and mutant marigold bushes) but not much fruit came from the plants.

 

This year is different.  Our soil has had time to decompose some more, plus we added the compost that we've been working on for the past couple of years.  Now call me evil, but I could write a whole blog post about how much I hate composting, but after seeing our garden this year, meh.  It's sort of magical.  Take a look.

 

 

 

 

 

From top of picture to bottom: Tomatoes, zucchini, cantaloupe, watermelon, swiss chard.

 Corn

From bottom to top: romaine, arugula, potatoes, more tomatoes, peas, cucumbers, blueberries, green onions.

 Blackberries that are turning black

Green onions

 

Ben and I sort of joke that we're leaving our house just as we're having success with our garden.  But all this work hasn't been in vain.  We've learned about how to get great soil, how to build a great box, how to treat each plant in the dirt, how important shade can be, etc.  I'm positive we're going to keep learning more, too.  After this, I think we should have a killer garden at our next house.  Way better than this one for sure.  I'm excited.

House Buying/Selling in Memes

Apparently selling a house and buying another one are two of life's major stresses.  So instead of telling you about how I'm handling this by eating the cookie dough I've frozen for showings, I'll just describe this experience by using memes. 

 

Story of my life.

 

I don't think I've ever seen my house this clean.  It's awesome to see it so sparkly.  Not having the worry of accidentally stepping on a lego is wonderful.  But if I'm being honest, I can't wait for the day when I can wake up and say, "Meh.  No cleaning today.  Let's just play."

 

I still don't know how to fold a fitted sheet.  And I swear I've folded as many fitted sheets in the last month of my life as I have in the last 24 years.  I'm wondering if this is some kind of concentrated dose of karma from all the years my mom did my laundry for me.

 

The mixed emotions of leaving one awesome house and going to another.

 

That moment when your house is finally (eek!) market ready and your kids decide to pull the door stop out of their room, bang the door, and leave a big dent in their wall.  But at least there isn't any proof of vaseline anywhere!  Our realtor even commented about how awesomely clean all of our carpets looked.  Cue the part where Ben and I snickered in the background thinking of every crazy thing we've had to clean out of our carpets.

 

When my kids tell me multiple times a day that I'm "the meanest mom EV-ER" because we had to take down the horsey swing, hide the sidewalk chalk, and pack up 70% of their toys.  Little do they know that we are actually moving for them.

 

Guilty.

 

Cross out "piece of clothing" and replace it with "house" and you've got a serious case of Heather-and-Ben-don't-like-debt-of-any-kind-and-will-slowly-walk-away-now.

 

 

Now if I could give my two cents, I would say this: don't do this when you're pregnant.  But a good portion of the time that's inevitable.  But I'm warning you, you may be sitting down doing a simple math problem to figure out what you can afford, get the answer completely wrong, and burst into tears because you're pregnant and that is the natural reaction to doing math incorrectly.  Not that I know this from experience...  When Ben pulled the tissue away from my face and I asked if my mascara was running, he was like, "Ummm...." and showed it to me.  Black.  Then I cleaned myself up in the bathroom and and when Ben saw me he asked, "Aw, were you crying again?"  Uh, no.  Thanks.  Ha!

 

Despite the stress, we really are excited about this process.  But I would be lying if I said that this was some picnic.  So for now, I'll just stick to the memes and the cookie dough.

We're moving. It's sort of a long story.

I'm not sure I know where this story starts.  But I'll try to make this make sense.

 

 

 

Back when we bought this house, we were told several times by the spirit that we were supposed to be in this exact house.  We had "that feeling" that house hunters often feel when they find "the one."  Then on other occasions, I literally recognized it as if I had seen it before.  Ben had similar experiences.

 

We planned to be here a while.  A while = quite a few more years than the 2.5 we have spent here.  But then a million things started happening.  I'll start with the most important.

 

About a year ago, I started getting preparing myself for Lily to start kindergarten.  I did so much research on schools that it felt like I did nothing else.  The elementary school that Lily's assigned to made us worry.  Let me clarify: there are 105 elementary schools in our district.  Only 3 are ranked lower than ours.  Ben and I both felt the need to try to get into a different school.  So we did everything we were possibly allowed to do.  Lily even ended up as #1 on the wait list for one of the schools we were interested in.  But after the few month waiting period, she didn't get in.  That was a huge wake up call for me.  But when it happened, I felt the spirit saying, "I'm trying to tell you something, Heather."

 

I don't even know how many times at this point that I had fasted about this matter.  And I don't think I missed a single night pouring out my concerns to Heavenly Father.  Despite my concerns, I had a feeling of peace that everything was going to be okay.  Other members of our family who fasted with us had similar experiences.

 

Back in the beginning of the year, as sort of a joke, I started house hunting online.  I knew we would have a different budget than we had 2.5 years ago.  We had *sort of* decided that we would be moving a few years earlier than planned, but still not in the near future. 

 

But I kept worrying about schools.  I convinced myself that Lily could make it through one or more years of school without getting behind.  As if on cue, a bunch of people started randomly telling me about how their kids were assigned to low rated schools and they were the best in their classes.  Then when they moved they had to given special help from their new school because they were so far behind their peers.  I started panicking a little.

 

Then Ben got a pretty sizable raise in April.  On that day, Ben and I agreed that our house would be on the market in a year.

 

But here's my problem.  Like I already said, I'm a researcher.  I like to plan how things are going to happen.  So we took one tiny little step into looking at houses, and we were sort of thrown into the thick of things.  I felt that some fast forward button kept getting pushed.  But it still felt right.

 

Eventually Ben and I ended up asking ourselves this question: Do we want to move before or after the baby comes?  I'm due September 19th.  At first we weren't sure because they both sounded pretty hard.  But then we felt like we should go ahead and get things moving now.

 

For the last few weeks we have worked, and worked, and worked on getting our house market ready.  Ben's parents helped us get far ahead of where we could have been on our own.  My parents have let us use their house as a temporary storage unit so our house looks less cluttered.  The realtor has come.  A stager has come.  An appraiser has come.

 

Our house is probably going on the market this week. 

 

To answer some questions:

 

Where are we going?  We are going to be staying in the general area.  But the top spot on our list right now is Holly Springs.

 

What are we going to miss the most?  Friends from our ward and the castle in the bonus room.  I never thought of myself as so attached to that castle before, but our kids spend hours in it everyday.  I will bawl my eyes out when we leave it.

 

All of this moving-this-summer business is so new to us, that we really haven't even had time to tell anyone, so please don't be bothered if we didn't tell you.  Plus, I'm still a little in denial that any of this is happening.  Either way, we feel like this is right, and I just pray that the next stage of selling/buying will go well.

 

There are a few other reasons why we're moving, but this is the reason that is most important to us.  Now here's to hoping that I can manage to keep my house looking stellar for showings with 3 small kids.

*Gulp*