Ben

Today is both our 8th anniversary and Father's Day.  If I'm going to be honest, there is no one I'd rather double-celebrate more in the whole world than Ben.  I could go on and on about him, but I'll just tell a quick story that summarizes Ben really well.

Over the years we have come to learn that working from home is awesome and terrible.  Most of the time it's awesome, but there are the few times when it's really inconvenient for the rest of the family.  Have you ever tried to convince a toddler not to throw a loud tantrum in a room next to where your husband has an important presentation in a WebEx?  No?  I'll just tell you, it's not very fun.  I don't know how many times I've heard Ben through the door saying, "Sorry, that's just one of my kids."

But for the most part, I love having Ben around during the day.  I have my best friend at home and we get to talk all day long.  There are some nap times when I need to run a kid-free errand and I can.  It's as simple and awesome as that.

But the biggest perk is when I'm starting to struggle with my patience.  Most days are fun and the kids and I come up with great things to do, and other days are full of responsibility and the kids want extra attention and I can't deliver.  Some days things break, tempers flare, tantrums fire, and the world becomes a darker place.

One day a couple of weeks ago, I was having one of those bad days.  The kids had worn my patience thin and no matter how many times I talked with them, it seemed like they wouldn't listen and would then make the excuse that they "forgot" when they repeated the same mistakes over and over.  The kids and I had just arrived home from somewhere and I quickly made them lunch and then disappeared because I was at my breaking point.  I told Ben my code phrase: "I'm going to the bathroom."  Unless we're out in public, he knows that this means, "I need a break."  Oftentimes, Ben jokingly responds, "Okay, see ya in a half hour."  Most of the time that's a joke, but sometimes it's a reality, depending on the day.

That particular day, I think I really did spend 20-30 minutes locked up in the bathroom because that's how long it took to calm myself.  After feeling guilty about being in there so long, I came out -- not fully calmed down -- to find that no one was around.  It was quiet.  As I walked around the downstairs I heard a really quiet voice upstairs.  I heard Ben singing Popcorn Popping and Once There Was a Snowman to a giggling Ella.  Lily and Skyler were in their separate rooms for quiet time and Thad was just put down for his nap.  Ben was singing to Ella as a way to stall for me because, if you know Ella, you know that I'm the only one who's allowed to put on her naptime diapers, buckle her into her booster, say personal prayers with her, and tuck her in.  But there he was, just singing and keeping her happy, not even once coming to tell me that he was waiting.

That was a very Ben thing to do.  It's the norm, not the exception, and that's one of the reasons why I love him so much.  He makes up for what I so often lack.

In honor of Ben, a month and a half ago when he was at a camporee with his scouts, the kids and I made our first ever video together.  I asked the kids dozens of questions about Ben (everything from "What music does Daddy listen to in the car?" Their answer: Shake It Off -- to "What time does Daddy wake up in the morning?" Their answer: 2 AM).  With the dozens of answers, the kids were able to come up with a little screenplay of their own.  So please, sit back and enjoy "A Day in the Life of Daddy."